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In This Episode

In this episode, John has a conversation with Megan Hunter, co-founder of the High Conflict Institute  about her work with the High Conflict Institute, her book Dating Radar (www.dating-radar.com) and her experience in navigating High Conflict Personalities.

Show Summary

The High Conflict Institute (www.highconflictinstitute.com) is an award-winning training and consulting firm helping professionals understand and manage high conflict disputes and challenging people.

High Conflict Personalities (HCP’s) typically refers to Narcissistic and Borderline Personalities and is marked by 4 character traits

1 Unmanaged emotions

2 Extreme behaviors and reactions

3 Blaming

4 All-or-Nothing Thinking

Often people who struggle with these types of personality traits have low or poor awareness of their extreme behaviors and their defense mechanisms often play into this low awareness.

Common Myths

• HCP’s are aware of what they’re doing and do these things on purpose as a calculated manipulation
• People who have a Personality Disorder are that way because they are mean or evil
• Only women have Borderline or Histrionic Personality Disorder, only men have Narcissistic or Anti-Social Personality Disorder.

Main Points

• Good relationships take time!
• HCP traits can sometimes take a year or more to surface, SO GO SLOWLY!!
• You CAN NOT change an HCP, you CAN NOT save an HCP
• HCP’s need significant, long-term, professional help

Meet Megan Hunter

Megan Hunter, MBA, is an expert educator in the area of high-conflict legal disputes and high-conflict relationships. She is CEO and co-founder of the High Conflict Institute with Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq. who developed the high conflict personality theory. She is also the founder and publisher at Unhooked Media, a media company focused on high-conflict disputes and complicated relationships.

Megan has trained legal, mental health, business, leadership groups, universities and other professionals across the United States, Australia, Canada, Italy, Scotland, South Africa, and Israel. She has strong policy and judicial training experience during her tenure at the Arizona Supreme Court, Administrative Office of the Courts, as Family Law Specialist and Child Support Specialist, and five years’ service to the Arizona Board of Psychologist Examiners. She is co-author of:

• BIFF at Work: Your Guide to Difficult Workplace Communication (2020)

• The High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide (2019)

• Dating Radar: Why Your Brain Says Yes to “The One” Who Will Make Your Life Hell (2017); and

• author of Bait & Switch: Saving Your Relationship When Incredible Romance Turns Into Exhausting Chaos (2015).

Originally from Nebraska, she lives with her husband in Arizona.

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Meet John Dennis

John is a licensed professional counselor with over 14 years of experience who specializes in counseling for individuals, couples, children, and adolescents. He focuses on working with anxious teens and adults, couples who are struggling to connect with one another, and those dealing with grief and loss.